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very soon

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Dec. 29th, 2006 | 11:46 pm
location: TARDIS
mood: sleepysleepy

things to do very soon, in order of needing to do soon, to needing to do not so soon...

1. kill the bogan neighbours

*thinks deeply* well actually that’s about it. I need to kill my bogan neighbours before they drive me out of my tiny mind (and my tiny-er room). They play their music so loud my floor vibrates, it's fucking mid afternoon and I'm looking around thinking to myself is that a small earthquake? but no, I soon realise it's much worse, it is square dancing music played at a level where human hearing no longer registers individual notes (not a problem for them as their brains dont register any more than individual syllables and have stopped working on higher brain functions by about midday - half an hour before they wake up)... and drunken gossip which is fighting to make itself heard over the music. Their bogan children are called Bailey (the girl) and Saxon, as in Anglo-Saxon, (the boy). Those kids are screwed for life. I'd say they are going to waste fortunes on therapy but it's more likely that they'll go to a psychic for help, or a psychotic... or they'll name their children Bailey and Saxon.

Anyhow I shouldn't bitch about the neighbours... I should just get off my lazy ass and kill them. Never mind, if not me, I'm sure SOMEONE will do it. I don't think I've ever actually hated anyone this much before, without ever meeting them, so well done to the bogans. Still, I'm trying to put a positive spin on things: it gives me the rare opportunity to study the Ipswich bogan in it's natural habitat (a rented house) and although I'd say the experience is giving me an education in bogans, I probably won't learn much because the truth is, (and we all know it) that any form of bogan education only goes up to grade ten, then you drop out and get a job somewhere as a check out chick. Well I hope that last sentence there made sense because I'm too tired to fix it if it didn't... in fact, didn't I update yesterday? Yeah that’s right, so no complaints or I’ll fry you in a VB batter and feed you to the bogans. That’s right. *shakes finger in threatening but sleepy fashion*

Anyhow, I should get some sleep... g’night

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